Jeremy and I conceived on December 6th, my mothers birthday. We were so thrilled because we had been trying to get pregnant. We went about the usual gittiness that comes with the positive pregnancy test and told a few select people, the ones who knew we were actively trying. After getting a confirmation from the doctor and setting up our first visit with our OBGYN, Dr. Sanford, we continued live life with the knowledge that we were going to be parents together again! We had two ultrasounds and got to see the most beautiful of heartbeats, it was so amazing. Unfortunatly, it was not to be as we found out at 8 weeks of pregnancy that we were losing our baby. I was very intune with my body from the moment we decided to conceive. I knew when I was ovulating, I knew at 8 dpo that I was pregnant and I knew I was miscarrying before the heartbeat even stopped beating. When I went to the doctor to tell them that something was not right, the heartbeat was at 140 bpm, but that did not settle my nerves in the least, I felt it in my bones that things were not playing out right. We went to the ER on my birthday and that is when the doctor there confirmed my fear, the heartbeat was gone, the baby was soon to follow. I had been so thrilled to find I had conceived on my mother's birthday, who I had lost when I was 26, it was like a gift. And then to find out a mere 8 weeks later, on my own birthday that it was all going to be gone, it was unbearable. How could this all be happening in such short succession? I cried, screamed and remained totally siilent all at once with all of my emotions running in wild frenzy for weeks. And now we have come full circle back to the "normal" cycle and to the beginning of the TTC dance once again. So there is the story, and here is where we will begin with a continuation or a new beginnning however you choose to read it. ~mai~
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